Friday, November 18, 2005

Questions that need to be answered

1. Has anyone seen Reese Witherspoon's bangs lately? Whaaattttt????? My personal opinion = if the long, feathered bangs are a trend on the rebound, then I'm gonna have to settle for being out-of-style. I caught her on Ellen this week and I couldn't get over it. I can't even remember a word she said because I was too busy gawking at her hair.

2. Does anyone watch Ellen? That show is so freakin' funny. It doesn't matter who she has on the show (minus little miss feather bangs)...I am always entertained. I've been working through the night for two weeks, which has given me a chance to catch up on all everything in my DVR and the problem I've found is I can only watch so much Ellen in one sitting. So, I need some recommendations. If you were me, what would you record. So far, I'm catching:
  • The Ellen Show...obviously
  • The West Wing...should win "best writing" Emmy every year
  • Best Week Ever...duh
  • Two and a Half Men...tie for funniest show on TV
  • Arrested Development...other half of tie for funniest show on TV
  • The Apprentice...both Trump and Martha
  • Pokemon...obligation
  • The OC...guilty pleasure



  • 3. Despite the above comment about her bangs, who wants to see Reese in Walk the Line this weekend?

    Thursday, November 17, 2005

    It has been a long time (exactly two months)

    Since my last post I’ve:

    • been in Hawaii, LA (twice), San Diego, San Francisco, Phoenix, Salt Lake City, Dallas, Atlanta (twice), Columbia (SC), Chicago, Boston, and Macon (GA)
    • only had 5 days off of work (including the weekends), but launched 12 of 15 “high priority” projects
    • spent more time alone than I thought was humanly possible, realizing that although I missed my friends terribly – there is something rewarding about being comfortable spending time with yourself
    • made good use of the phrase “I’ll cut you” until I actually cut myself and ended up with stitches and two weeks without the use of my left hand
    • let go of a friendship that became a burden and ended a relationship that broke my heart
    • cried and prayed and yelled and cursed more times than I can remember
    • finished the short stories I’ve been working on for months two weeks before my computer had a meltdown that I'd been trying to have for weeks
    • written all of my very personal hopes and thoughts and fears and concerns and prayers in a journal only to leave it in the front seat pocket of an airplane
    • learned that at the end of the day - even if you have the best friends in the world - you can only truly count on yourself, God, and your mama…and most of the time that is all you need


    Thanks for all of the notes and comments since I took my sabbatical. It is nice to know people actually read this thing. So, I’m back with a smile on my face and a lot to say about nothing.

    Wednesday, August 17, 2005

    P. Weezie

    I'm sure everyone has seen/heard/read that P. Diddy is changing his name. Yup, for the 17th time, he wants to be called something different. At first, I thought it was lame, but then I remembered that I, myself, have about seven or eight nicknames and people in glass houses...blah, blah, blah. Anyway, I kind of liked the sound of P. Diddy. But, now he has dropped the "P" and he is just Diddy.

    OK - Diddy, I'll take that "P" you just tossed away and put it to good use...from now on I'll be P. Weezie.

    Friday, July 29, 2005

    Vacation: Day Two, Day Three

    The first two days of my vacation have flown by. In the past 48 hours, I’ve done nothing but eat, sun, and shop. The first day, we just hung out at the pool. I got my first real sun for the season and then we went shopping. My sister and I had a very late lunch (where I couldn’t enjoy a nice, tall Anchor Steam, my favorite beer, because I’d left my ID in our room. I wasn’t sure whether to be flattered or annoyed, but I was on vacation and was relaxed enough sans beer) and then spent the rest of the day shopping.

    Having not adjusted to the time change, sister was ready for bed at 7:00, which left me the rest of the evening to read and do some writing. I finished a short story that I’ve been working on for seven months and tried to get past the point of no completion in the novel I’m certain I will never finish. Regardless, I had some time to get some writing done which is always a good thing.

    The second day we went to the beach. I have to admit, I like staying in a place where someone carried your stuff to the beach and sets up your chair and umbrella. I read my book and napped until my sister got bored and insisted we get in the water. We rented boogie boards and tried to ride the waves, but the current was too strong to stay on. I decided to give it up when I ended up getting thrown onto the shore, face first with the world’s largest wedgie…good thing all of my falling down has kept me from being easily embarrassed.

    Wedgie aside, nothing too exciting has happened since I’ve arrived. I am totally relaxed and have barely given all of the stress that as been wearing me down a second thought. It all seems to be so far away…I guess it takes four time zones and a large stretch of the pacific to get away from your troubles. Next year – I’ll go to Fiji!

    Tuesday, July 26, 2005

    Vacation Day One

    I began my vacation today. I’ve been looking forward to it and dreading it all in the same breath for a number of weeks. I’ve been dreading it because I have too much work to do to leave town for a tropical island for a week…looking forward to it because if my brain doesn’t get a chance to relax, it may sprout legs and take off for good…which would leave me crazy or crazier than usual and we all know that isn’t a good thing.

    So, I’m off in vacation. Just to make sure things would be “normal” upon my return, I left the city this morning with seven outstanding items on my professional “to do” list and two items on my personal “to figure out” list or better said, both situations with NB and Either/Or as complicated as possible. However, I’ve made an agreement with myself that I’ll try to think of all of these things as little as possible over the next nine days. So far, it’s going ok…although I’ve yet to leave the mainland US.

    I managed to leave my apartment and NYC without any cab, train, or airport delays. The flight from NYC to Atlanta was quick and very easy thanks to my first class upgrade. I was totally bummed when I checked my itinerary yesterday to find that of the 12 hours of travel time I was facing today, I’d only gotten an upgrade for the first leg, all of two hours, from the city to Atlanta. But I took advantage of the upgrade regardless and in order to truly kick-off my vacation; I ordered my first cocktail at exactly one minute after noon on the first leg of the trip. Actually, we got into Atlanta early enough for me to grab Chick-Fil-A before the ridiculously long flight to Hawaii, with a short stop in San Fran. With an order of chicken nuggets in hand, I said a small prayer about safe flights and nice travel neighbors for the long ride in coach and boarded the plane.

    After settling in my tiny aisle seat in an exit row (thank goodness), I decided this trip wouldn’t be anything I couldn’t bear even though this exit row seat was one of those tricky ones that don’t recline. Just when I’d gotten everything settled and was heading to the restroom for one last time before take off, a couple walked up and began their attempt to shove their carry-ons into the overhead bins. The lady was sitting in the window seat next to me. Her male companion, to whom I am now referring to as SANTA, was sitting in an aisle seat four rows back. Santa began his sales process about how I may enjoy the seat four rows back and before he could even get into his pitch about the seats that do and don’t recline and whatnot, I told him I’d be happy to trade seats with him. Although I’m finding myself a little bitter towards romance today, I know I would hate to be traveling on a flight across the United States, stuck next to some stranger, with my husband four seats away.

    It reminded me of the time Either/Or and I were both traveling back from the west coast on business and although we booked our travel without knowing one another would be in the same place at the same time, we ended up on the same flight in seats next to each other. It was the first time I remember feeling that I odd feeling that resembled something like love for him. I say this because on that trip I was number one on the upgrade list with nine seats unassigned (in frequent flyer speak, that equals guaranteed upgrade) and I gave the upgrade up because I’d rather be miserable in coach for six hours next to him than be semi-comfortable in first class knowing he was less than ten rows back and I wasn’t with him.

    Anyways (again I digress), I had just settled into my second seat when the stewardess came back looking for the gentleman, or should I say, Santa. I told her that he was seated in my seat and she could find him in 12B. As I began reading my new book, Santa came back to my seat to thank me again for switching seats and to tell me that some good deeds are quickly rewarded because he had been upgraded to first class and his wife had not, so my new seat was 1C. That, my friends, is a perfect example of karma. The sweet couple got to sit together and I got to drown away my romantic bitterness with the Napa wine tasting they just finished serving after three hours...I’m surprised I can still type. This trip may be just what the doctor ordered.

    Wednesday, July 20, 2005

    Dear Larry,

    Since I think you read my blog more often than you check email, I figured I'd write you a note. I feel like I haven't seen you in weeks. I'm still trapped in this freezing conference room working on really boring stuff.

    How are things up your way? Anything new and exciting going on? Please come visit soon. I need to be entertained.

    Your friend,
    Weezie

    PS - MUPP is back in town. We really should have toilet papered his space when we had the chance. Be nice to him - he can't help the fact that he is only slightly smarter than a cocker spaniel.

    Wednesday, July 13, 2005

    Celeb Spotting

    Since I moved to NYC, I've been pretty lucky on the celebrity spotting front. I've bumped into (literally) Matt Damon at the gym and had conversations with (as in more than 5 minutes of) Stephen Malkmus, Tina Fey, and Drew Barrymore. But only the Malkmus encounter comes close to this morning's celebrity spotting. I passed Vince Vaughn on the sidewalk. I didn't bump into him and I didn't talk to him, but he was very close. If I could adore him more (he is already number one on my top five celebrity crush list), I would now because he is MUCH cuter in person. I'm taking it as a sign that today won't suck, because yesterday sucked and Monday REALLY sucked.

    Monday, July 11, 2005

    The Big Picture

    This weekend was on of the all-time worst. It kicked into low-gear on Friday with a company picnic. I have some of the world’s coolest co-workers. But as much as I like to hang with most of them, I’m extremely overworked and I’ve got too much to do to spend the day out of the office at a company picnic. But, it wasn’t an opt-out situation and there were decent activities and fried chicken involved, so I decided to make the best of it. However, making the best of it became impossible when I woke up Friday morning to a forecast calling for 100 percent chance of rain, with a flood-warning in effect, and a temperature that wasn’t supposed to reach 65. We still went and there were no indoor facilities at the picnic site.

    However, there was a covered pavilion with picnic tables and a slue of board games provided by HR for entertainment. Most of the crew played games, while myself and three others decided to entertain ourselves by attempting to trump one another’s complaints. At one point, I offered one of them everything in my messenger bag if she would kindly put me out of my misery by holding the plastic poncho I was wearing around my head as I attempted to breathe deeply. She didn’t take me up on it. It wasn’t because she was avoiding a possible murder charge. She declined my offer because she wasn’t interested in anything in my bag. I don’t know why. The contents included: a new pack of Orbit gum (the new citrus flavor…quite tasty!) a gameboy, the latest copy of Internet Retailer magazine, my cell phone, my sidekick, my wallet and the keys to my apartment. Her loss - she wasn’t thinking big picture. Taking the bag would’ve given her access to all of my belongings and she could have held one hell of a yard sale. Lesson learned: always think about the big picture when making an important decision.

    This leads me to the next part of my weekend that sucked…I had my final falling out with Either/Or. I know I said this weeks ago, but things are finally finished with him. D-O-N-E! I’ve been dragging out the “cutting the ties” conversation, because since we had our last “d-o-n-e” conversation, things have been really great between us. However, in looking at the big picture, I realized by letting things continue as is, I’d never move on and would quite possibly miss my chance to see where things would go with NB. The last time this happened, I wasn’t thinking about the big picture and I let Either/Or worm his way back into my life. But, now I’m all about the big picture…what hurts in the short term will pay off on the long run.

    For once, I’m glad the weekend is over.

    Tuesday, July 05, 2005

    R&R

    This weekend was just what the doctor ordered…lots of quality time with my friends and the new boy (NB). Needing some long awaited rest and relaxation, we spent three days sleeping, eating, drinking, shopping, and sunning. The holiday weekend culminated yesterday with activities involving a picnic in the park with a view of one of my all-time favorite bands, corndogs, margaritas, and a roof-top view of the fireworks.

    Monday, June 27, 2005

    Weekend Update

    The highlight of this weekend doesn't involve shoes, boys, or bands. My favorite part of the weekend was riding a bike for the first time in years. It was really fun, despite the fact that it was a billion degrees outside. “Either/Or” and I took his bike to Central Park, rented a bike for me and rode around the loop. Then we decided to leave the park and take a trip down the Westside to the G.W. bridge. I had such a good time that I’m thinking of getting a bike of my own. I’ve been thinking all weekend about my new bike and I’ve got a clear image in mind of what I want. It will be silver or black with a black wicker basket on the front (for one day transporting my cute, little dog) and a pink horn. The only tricky part of the purchase is finding a helmet that is functional, yet fashionable.

    Sunday, June 26, 2005

    Either/Or

    I rarely call anyone I’m dating by their real name when talking about them; I just refer to them as “Boy.” And when we are no longer dating, they always get a nickname for future reference. For example, the “Boy” of 2004 was promptly named “He Who” short for “He who should not be named - EVER” shortly after we severed ties. The one before him went from “Boy” to “Wig” because of his out-of-control hair. One of my work friends came up with the perfect name for the one whom, until recently, was called “Boy.” He has now been named “Either/Or” which is short for “Either he is your ‘Boy’ or he’s not, Weezie!”

    Pure genius!

    Thursday, June 23, 2005

    Falling down

    I am a lot of things...graceful isn't one of them. Seriously, I can fall down just standing there. For instance, this morning (during rush hour) I tripped over my own two feet and completed a nice face plant in the middle of Grand Central Station at 9:00 in the morning. Thank goodness nobody saw it. Uh - kidding...everyone saw it. I think there was even a second or two when everyone halted and stopped breathing because it felt sooo quiet in the middle of the atrium.

    I'm so used to the falling bit that I stopped getting embarrassed a long time ago. I think the last time I was truly embarrassed by a fall was my junior year in college when I fell down a flight of stairs at Jacksonville Landing after the GA/FL football game...it was a bad fall. My skirt flew up, I broke the heel of one shoe and fractured my arm in three places.

    Anyway, the only thing that really irritated me was I was donning a new pair of pants that I'd been waiting for weeks to wear, saving them for something important...like a third date with a cute boy. I ended up having to buy another pair of pants at lunch due to the large dirt spot left by the floor. And then the shoes I was wearing didn't really match, so I was forced to buy another pair of shoes...being a klutz is freaking expensive.

    Tuesday, June 21, 2005

    Modest Mouse

    Modest Mouse played last night at the Summerstage in Central Park. It was an okay show. I got to hang with two of my favorite people in town, but the performance left something to be desired. First of all, it just wasn’t a good venue for them. Second, why do they have two drummers? The percussions aren’t that complicated. Do they not realize that one bad drummer plus an average drummer does not equal one good drummer?

    Friday, June 17, 2005

    I Heart MR

    So, once again, it has been way too long since I’ve written anything because work is still crazy busy. My relationship is now non-existent – which frees up some time, but ending it has taken most of my energy. And, on top of that, I’ve been really sick.

    Needless to say, I don’t have much to speak out about…except that last night Mo Rocca had a piece on “The Tonight Show” and it was too funny. Basically, it was a very witty “mockumentary” about Superman filmed in Metropolis. First of all, anything that Mo Rocca does is usually very funny, but he also found a way to incorporate the Dukes of Hazzard and the General Lee, which he jumped into a la Bo and Luke Duke style (which for the kids that didn’t a) live in america or b) didn’t have a TV means via the window, into the piece. He ended the whole thing eating a corndog – which we know I love. It made for a great end to my less than great day.

    Yes - pathetic as it may be, that’s all I got.

    Wednesday, June 01, 2005

    “Backstreet’s back all-right”…

    For the past two weeks, I’ve been pretty much consumed by an overwhelming amount of work and my highly entertaining, but utterly frustrating love life. Since I try not to write much about either subject, I haven’t had much to say. But, even though work is tough and I’m in relationship limbo, Weezie is still smiling because it is summer, I live in NYC, and my iPod is loaded (and will be loaded) with great new tunes. I’m so freakin’ excited about all the great albums that have just come out or are being released soon. Who’s with me?

    I just finished listening to round one of the new Stephen Malkmus album and, in my opinion (although VERY biased), it is great. I’m bummed that I’ll miss his show next week, but at least the tickets will be put to good use, especially if ALK takes a cute boy with her.

    So, in addition to the new SM & the Jicks album, I think the Beck album = great; Ben Folds = great; Doves = great; Spoon = good; Dave Mathews = good (which is big b/c I’m not much of a DMB fan). I haven’t heard the new Audioslave album yet, but it can’t suck and Weezer’s new album has to at least be better than their DVD which was excruciating to watch. I’m anxiously awaiting the new Bright Eyes single, along with the White Stripes and Coldplay albums, but I am just going to assume they will also = great. All of that and Nick Carter and friends are back in business...who wouldn’t be excited?

    Tuesday, May 17, 2005

    grumpy smurf speaks out (part deux)

    I'm totally grumpy again today. I can now add the following reasons to yesterday's small list of reasons for my grumpy mood:
    1. I gained another 107 pounds last night, so you can imagine how comfortable I am right now and how much I HATE what I'm wearing.
    2. I had someone on my team change her vacation around so we could attend a conference in two weeks that sold out about 10 minutes before I tried to register.
    3. I am more than likely not going to be able to go to Hawaii as planned this summer due to work.
    4. My air conditioning in my apartment is busted and my landlord told me that according to my lease, they don't fix the air. That, plus the fact that my tub is still clogging up
    5. I was stung by a wasp at lunch - on the side of my neck - which is now the size of Alaska.
    6. i still hate my haircut.
    7. I simply want to cry at my desk for all of the reasons listed above especially one, three, and five.

    Monday, May 16, 2005

    grumpy smurf speaks out

    Today is definitely a Monday and on this particular Monday, I am definitely playing the role of Grumpy Smurf. I can’t exactly pinpoint why I’m so grumpy. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I really didn’t get much sleep this weekend and it wasn’t because I was doing anything fun. It could be due to the fact that I had a spa day planned today, but had to be at work because my boss is out and we can’t both be gone without the world coming to an end. Or maybe I’m grumpy because I somehow gained 107 pounds overnight. Seriously I’ve had this feeling all day that I’m pushing Sumo-size and could very well be shaking the ground as I walk. And I really don’t like what I’m wearing today and I think I’m done with my haircut and I’m definitely over bicyclists in Manhattan that don’t obey traffic rules and I’m sorry it took me 7 minutes longer than usual to decide what toppings I wanted on the salad I eat every day for lunch, but I can’t help the fact that I couldn’t decide if I wanted tuna or salmon.

    In order to make sure my grumpiness doesn’t rub off on my co-workers, I’ve decided I’ll spend the rest of the day quietly playing Gameboy at my desk.

    Thursday, May 12, 2005

    This week's most popular sites

    5. http://www.cootersplace.com/
    A discussion with a co-worker about the Dukes of Hazzard prompted me to research a fact or two about Cooter. Google led me here where I entertained myself for way too long and actually made a purchase.

    4. http://www.mcsweeneys.net/links/lists/26DougErickson.html
    McSweeney’s is a regularly visited site because it’s guaranteed I’ll find a list that makes me laugh out loud for days. This list is my favorite because it’s about time someone took the time to point out how lame these lyrics were…I should know since I have every word burned into my mind and if I speak them aloud, without the beats V. Ice ripped off from Queen in the background, it sounds ridiculous.

    3. http://members.cox.net/ladysarakat/piggy.swf
    This made me laugh more and more every single time I clicked the pig. It still makes me laugh over and over again.

    2. http://www.rankortank.com/zzz.htm
    This jewel of a site was sent to me by a dear friend who knew I needed a pick-me-up one day last week. I don’t think I need an explanation as to why I can visit this page again and again.

    1. http://swannydoestaiwan2005.blogspot.com/
    I’m eagerly awaiting updates on my friend’s trip to Taiwan and I love this site for two reasons. One - because I can be assured he’s doing okay when he makes an update. Two – his writing is very entertaining and the stories he shares about conversations with his grandfather are amazing and inspirational.
    *Bonus = the fact that I basically forced him to start this blog and its existence proves that enough nagging will make someone do anything.

    Tuesday, May 10, 2005

    I want to be Beck's summer girl

    I finally got the new Beck album loaded on my iPod and like most of his albums, it has taken me a listen or two to like it. Now, I LOVE it. In fact, today I caught myself walking with a little skip in my step like I was the star of the video for the "Girl" track. I'm not sure if it is because the song is just that great, or because the electronica intro is so catchy, or because the sun is shining and I'm wearing my new and very, very lovely spring skirt, but I was so into it that I seriously considered dancing at the crosswalk on the way into the office.

    Anyway, I know they just wrapped up production on the video and I'm wondering if it will turn out to be anything like what I've imagined in my mind...starring someone that looks like me wearing a flowered skirt and dark sunglasses dancing in the crosswalk on the way to work. Suddenly, she makes a detour, grabs the cute boy standing next to her in the street and heads to the park to eat corn dogs and Mr. Softee, while lounging and day dreaming all day in the sun.

    I'm guessing the video won't turn out as pleasant as I've wished, seeming as the lyrics to the song are actually pretty dark. But a girl can dream, right. Now, I really want a corn dog.

    PS - in my imaginary video, my legs were very tan...seriously, I took my dark sunglasses off for a quick second and made the mistake of looking down, catching a glimpse of my pasty white legs...am losing sight in my right eye as we speak.

    Wednesday, May 04, 2005

    Question for an accountant...

    Over the past few days I've been doing a lot of assessment of online stores. I mean, as an ecommerce professional, I must be up-to-date on the best practices in the industry. This has forced me to look closely at online shopping sites, take note of their merchandising strategies, evaluate the shopping experience, and audit their check-out process. In order to get a firm understanding of these best practices, I've been forced to browse, shop, and purchase at a number of sites.

    This brings me to my question...since I've technically been making these purchases as part of professional research, can I create a $2000 line item on next year's tax return marked "professional research?"

    Tuesday, May 03, 2005

    The Pain of Beauty

    Everyone has those days. You know the ones where you walk out of your house and catch a glimpse of yourself in the reflection of a storefront window and you think, “Man, I look good today.” Well, today is one of those days for me. Having a very pivotal date (and by that i mean, we've been out enough times that the "define the relationship" talk is coming up - not pivotal in terms of what gutter-minded readers may be thinking) with the new boy and a busy work schedule, I was forced to don the work-to-date attire, which you ladies know can prove quite challenging. With precision, I selected an outfit that is work appropriate and, with the removal of the short jacket and a change in earrings, is a hot number that will turn heads.

    There is one not-so-perfect thing about my outfit; the hot little strappy heels I selected are already killing my feet. However, like a true fashionista, I will sacrifice comfort for beauty. I made a new discovery - If you walk, all sexy-like, with a slight shake of your tailfeather, you forget your feet are killing you. It also helps to listen to “No Scrubs” on repeat, which can relieve all pain – physical and emotional. In fact, I’ve decided I love the song so much; I’m going to write my own version. Be on the lookout for the "No Scrubs remixx."

    Monday, May 02, 2005

    Why I love my job…

    5. I love to travel to Japan and I really LOVE to shop. Well, now I get to travel to the far east to SHOP for toys and trinkets and someone else is paying for it.
    4. We watch The Simpsons everyday at lunch. No explanation needed.
    3. Working for a Japanese company rocks. One, I get to practice my Japanese with my co-workers. Second, translating slogans and taglines from Japanese to English is highly entertaining on a weekly basis.
    2. Who wouldn’t love working for a company that peddles cartoon and video games?
    1. Dudes LOVE the fact that I work for a company that peddles cartoons and video games. I’ve been asked out four times in two weeks after engaging in delightful conversation struck up by the fact that I was playing my new gameboy to learn the games on my commute. And this weekend, I found myself at a party, feeling like Scarlett at the Wilkes' bar-b-que, surrounded by boys hanging on my every word. As soon as any male found out where I worked, it seemed to raise my cool points significantly. While I'm sure I can stand on my own without the cool job, I don’t know anyone who wouldn’t enjoy the attention. I know I’m digging it.

    Wednesday, April 20, 2005

    Fleeting moment...

    Some cute dude in the elevator just said to me, "nice bag, marc jacobs, right?" At first I thought we were going to get married (or at least make out), because you have to marry (or randomly make out with) any man that has an eye for handbags. Unless, of course, he is gay; in that case, you instantly become friends and he is destined to be your new gay boyfriend.

    So, to determine his team preference, I coyly smiled, complimented his designer recognition skills, and then inquired about the nature of his acquisition of such rare skills...totally straight and, of course, his wife works for M.J. and "has a closet full of them". I'll bet she is super skinny and eats only chocolate all day, too.

    Wednesday, April 13, 2005

    hey ya'll - we gonna get it right herre...

    ...it's the reMIXX.

    Today is my last day at my current job. I only have four hours until I blow this popsicle stand and head to happy hour for celebratory beverages. Some of my favorite co-workers took me out for lunch where I enjoyed a cocktail that has left me at my desk with a slight buzz...no surprise since it was Hennesey and Hyponotic. Chingy would be proud!

    Tuesday, April 12, 2005

    Sorry iTunes

    OK – so I have to totally apologize to iTunes. After working my way through four iPods in two weeks, blaming iTunes 4.7.1 for the demise of each one, I came to a stark realization. When an Apple genius handed me my fourth device, which I’ve named Bessie (with the hope that she’ll survive like a good ole’ Bessie should), she reminded me to keep Bessie away from speakers, metal, and magnets because these things, especially metal and magnets, would erase the hard drive. “Uh, duh – of course, I would never so such a thing,” I replied, reaching for my handbag.

    Visual Interlude
    Please visit this site - http://www.neimanmarcus.com/store/catalog/prod.jhtml?itemId=prod17060082&parentId=cat5010737&masterId=cat5010735&index=8&cmCat=

    Now, view photo of said handbag and notice the front pocket. This is where I keep my iPod. Yes, you are seeing correctly, right in the pocket with a large metal buckle and magnetic clasp.

    Back to the story
    Isn’t the bag beautiful? It was purchased about two days before Kid Sister kicked it. I'm so sorry iTunes. I take back all off the nasty things I've said about you over the last few weeks. And to Kid Sister and Leon - I'm humiliated and so very sorry to have put you in harm's way...

    Friday, April 08, 2005

    Hope

    “An emotional tsunami is a devastating occurrence. It hits you out of nowhere, washing away your sense of balance, destroying everything it touches, taking with it everything you know to be true and good and honest. You crash with the wave, physically swept away only to return to land to face the challenge of cleaning up the wreckage and rebuilding.”

    These words were written in my journal dated a year ago today, after what I hope will be the worst personal experience I encounter, when I felt like my entire life had fallen apart. It is ironic that today, a year after this was written; I feel that for the first time in my life, everything is finally coming together. I’ve realized who I am, I know where I’m going, and I’ve found hope.

    Tuesday, April 05, 2005

    It's about time...

    ...that Carolina didn't choke at the big dance. I'm so excited I can't even sit still. Way to go boys! Sean May is without a doubt one of the greatest college bball players of all time. Today is a beautiful day.

    iTunes 4.7.1 killed Kid Sister

    I don't go anywhere without my iPod...hence why I named it "Kid sister," after the female version of "my buddy." For those of you that are old enough to remember the commercials - you understand..."wherever I go, she goes...kid sister and me." (Btw- I totally stole that from ALK b/c she calls her my buddy.) Anyway, understanding my attachment to Kid Sister, anyone can imagine how distressed I became when Kid Sister fell ill about a week ago. Here are the events that lead to her illness and unfortunate death:

    1. I tried to buy beck's new album from itunes. In order to purchase, itunes made me upgrade to the new version.
    2. In order to sync Kid Sister, to listen to new beck album, I had to download and run the new ipod software b/c it wasn't compatible with the new itunes.
    3. Installing new ipod update took all day because it kept crapping out...then it crashed my machine. Unfortunately, Kid Sister was connected at time of crash with "do not disconnect" blinking at me. For future reference, when a machine crashes and restarts, the ipod thinks you have disobeyed it and it has been disconnected and…freaks out!
    4. So, Kid Sister started doing crazy, crazy stuff and crashed, displaying the folder/triangle/exclamation point symbol which means - your ipod is jacked up.
    5. I called the apple service number - but my 3 months phone service privilege has expired and in order to receive phone support, I have to pay $65. This is annoying and it seems a little ridiculous, almost as ridiculous as the $40 earphones I bought in December totally breaking two months later. (It isn't apple's fault that I had to buy them b/c my tiny ears are too small for the ones that came with the ipod, but COME ON $40 for earphones that die after a few months.)
    6. Anyway, I was told by the “expensive phone consultant” that I need to go into the store and they can help me. So that afternoon, I head down to the Apple store only to find that you must make an appointment, which you can only do for the same day and all of the spots tend to fill up within an hour of the store opening…which meant I was going to have to get there early…
    7. So, next day I show up at the store at 9:00 (it opens at 9:30) and am the 11th person in line to make an appointment. I put my name on the list and finally get to discuss my issue with a “genius” at the “genius bar” about an hour and a half later. After four and a half hours, the geniuses just decided to put Kid Sister to rest, give me a new ipod (now named Leon), and sent me on my way.
    8. After about two hours, I’d gotten most of the songs back in place – EXCEPT the new Beck album. For some reason, it wouldn’t load. So, I reconnected to itunes to update Leon and guess what???? Exactly – return to number 2.

    I spent most of the day yesterday trying everything I could think of to fix the problem and I think I’m almost there, but of course, itunes crapped out the last time I tried to update my songs…am going to figure this out…might need some help…am currently searching for someone who understands PCs, technology, itunes, and ipod and knows how desperate one feels after being alive for 4 entire days with no working ipod…am having trouble breathing.

    Friday, February 18, 2005

    "Oh, What a World"

    "Why am I always on a plane or a fast train. Oh what a world my parents gave me. Always travelin' but not in love..."

    Enough is enough. I'm done with the plane and the fast train. It might be enough for Rufus, but it ain't working or me. Why does everyone think that traveling for work is so freakin’ exciting? I live in New York City. Now, that’s exciting. But, I never get to enjoy living in the greatest city in the world because I am always spending quality time with Delta, Hilton, or Hertz. For instance, when I checked into my hotel last night, I had a hand-written note from the hotel manager thanking me for my dedication to the Hilton Family Hotels. The hand-written note brought tears to my eyes…not in a “oh, how sweet, I am touched” sort of way, but more in an “I want to be in my bed, in my house, in my city” sort of way. If I click my heels together, will it take me home? Where are the red-sequined shoes when you need them?

    Sunday, January 30, 2005

    There are no cats in America and the streets are paved with cheese...

    When I moved to New York, everybody warned me about the high cost of living and the cold, but nobody bothered to warn me about the rodent population. I’ve seen the rats in the subway and the mice in the streets, but I never thought I’d see a mouse in my house. But, yesterday I spotted Fred, my new four-legged roommate.

    Since I’m the only one paying rent it this place, he has got to move out. I’m not so sure how to get him to leave. The polite thing would be to write him a note, but that doesn’t seem like the most realistic option. I’ve already tried talking to him and I thought we had an agreement that when I’m home, he’d stay under the fridge. But, this morning, Fred broke the rules and has been scampering back and forth between his home under the fridge and the bathroom. Since I can’t possibly wear my snow boots around the apartment all day, and I am certain that at some point this afternoon, I’m going to have to use the restroom, Fred must go before he sends an evite to his friends for a party under the fridge in 3B.

    I just took a trip to Kmart to see about getting rid of the little critter. I couldn’t bring myself to buy the poison. First, I didn’t want everyone at Kmart to know I was plotting a murder. Second, I can’t fathom the thought of Fred dying in my house and then having to get rid of him myself. Therefore, I ended up buying these ultrasonic pest control devices that you plug into the wall that creates a noise so intense that it basically gives mice a nervous breakdown causing them to flee the premises. I am now convinced that these devices rank up there with the iPod as one of the greatest inventions of all time.

    Within seconds after plugging the devices into the wall, Fred made his escape from under the fridge to the bathroom where I’ve now discovered I have a small hole in the wall behind the toilet. A happy ending for all – Fred lives and I can finally take my snow boots off.

    Sunday, January 23, 2005

    Sad day for the weez

    Today is the truly the first sad day of 2005; First, a day-long ski trip to one of the greatest places in north America isn’t going to happen. I’ve been waiting for this trip for months, more for the scenery than the skiing. Sure, I’ve been longing for the slopes, but it’s slopes atop the mountain at Squaw Valley that I will miss the most. I yearn to be at the top of the mountain, overlooking Lake Tahoe. Every time I’m there I feel a sense of renewal and this year I need that renewal more than ever.

    So, while I’ve been waiting for months to be at the top of that mountain, I’ve been waiting for 15 years for my Steelers to make it to the big game. But, it looks like that ain’t happening either. When I boarded the plane, it was looking bad…down by three touchdowns. I’m actually glad to be flying for the rest of the game because it is a personal rule of mine that I don’t cry in public.

    PS - To the ding-dong sitting next to me while we were waiting in the terminal…you are exactly the kind of dude I try to avoid. It doesn’t help that you grew up in Gainesville (an admitted “die hard gator fan”), went to Duke (a shortcoming that needs no explanation), and were pulling for the Pats (not because you cared about the team, but because you feel that “nothing good has ever come out of Pittsburgh”). Those things simply make you annoying. What makes you intolerable is the way you were trashing people sitting nearby to a complete stranger and if I could hear you, there is a good chance that they could hear you. I’m sorry that someone in your past didn’t accept you. Please seek therapy to overcome your insecurities and find a real team to pull for.

    Friday, January 21, 2005

    Freedom for all

    "The best hope for peace in our world is the expansion of freedom in all the world." - President Bush

    Does this mean that there is more than one world? If so, does anyone have a brochure? I'm thinking of moving or at least visiting...time to update my passport. Our president is so smart. He is always teaching me new things. He has opened my eyes to the existence of multiple Internets, an entirely new vocabulary, and now this. Thank you, Dubya!

    Thursday, January 20, 2005

    Getting Old Sucks

    I am still amazed that the older you get, the longer your hangovers last. Right now, i feel like someone ran over me 17 times with a truck before beating me over the head with a steel rod...this pain, by the way, is the aftermath from a night of drinking that occured two days ago. Granted nothing less should be expected when you kick off a tuesday night off with a martini, followed by 111 glasses of wine, with a mojito as dessert. But come on, this is too much. Isn't it punishment enough that after leaving the bar, i couldn't find a cab and had to walk 30 blocks home in nine degree weather? (p.s. - the bar was actually 10 blocks away from my apartment...i walked 10 blocks in the wrong direction before realizing it...i am an idiot - i know.) I'll do anything to feel better - even thought of never drinking again, but that is not an option...am heading straight from work to a date with the hair of the dog.